My area of expertise is Christian spiritual guidance. For 26 years, I have been guiding Christian women from a wide variety of Christian denominations on their individual journeys with the Lord.

This article is fairly long.

I don’t apologize for this. You need to know some basic things about a person who has offered to accompany and guide you on something as fundamental and critical as your Christian spiritual journey!

You need to know something about a guide’s own personal life experience of walking with the Lord, her training, and her experience in guiding others.

It’s critically important, therefore, for a spiritual guide like myself to be fully transparent and accountable to anyone receiving her guidance.

So …I want to be fair to you and give you an opportunity to understand who I am and what I represent.

Purpose of an Effective Guide

Having a spiritual guide is desirable at any time in your Christian journey.

But it can be critical at times of crisis in your life.

The real gift of an effective spiritual guide is the ability to introduce you to the most caring, loving, effective and reliable Guide there is: The Lord himself.

Requirements of an Effective Guide

In order to be able to do this, the guide must have

• an authentic personal relationship with God
• a track record of personal experience in the Christian journey
• a proven track record of successfully guiding others
• some degree of special training in spiritual formation and/or guidance

Characteristics of an Effective Guide

An effective guide is

• centered in

God
His love
His peace
His joy
well-versed in the scriptures

• patient
• honest
• non-judgmental
• a woman of moral integrity
• a woman who can be trusted
• compassionate

An effective guide must also

• care deeply about and be truly dedicated to helping others on their path to God
• have a strongly-developed sense of her own personal identity in God
• exhibit the fruits of the Spirit:

…the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.

Galatians 5:22 NIV

• be a deep and attentive listener
• enjoy a healthy sense of humour
• take herself seriously, but not solemnly!

 

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The Importance of a Guide’s

Personal and Working Experience

Someone said that an ounce of experience is worth a ton of theory.

I believe this is particularly true in the field of Christian spiritual guidance, which is my forte.

The disciples had to experience the gospels before they could ever write a single word about them!

The apostle Paul had to experience meeting Jesus in his dramatic conversion before he could write down and teach all the theology behind it!

In the end, only personal experience can testify to Truth.

In my 74 years of living, I have fully and repeatedly experienced everything I teach.

My story  helps you understand how I arrived here.

I believe —and I say this very humbly —that I have

• a ‘lived’ personal relationship with God of nearly 38 years
• the basic training
• the life experiences
• 26 years of successfully guiding Christian women from a wide variety of Christian denominations on their individual Christian journeys
• 26 years of teaching them how to pray with their prayer heart

These are all necessary qualifications for me to be able to take you to a FIRSTHAND EXPERIENCE of the Lord and of His love.

This experience takes you well beyond Christian doctrine and tradition to a meeting with the Person at their centre.

My single goal is to place you, and to keep you, in direct touch with the Lord himself.

He then becomes your actual Teacher.

My job is simply to facilitate your gradual meeting with the Lord himself!

If I can do that, A Clear Path to God will have succeeded in its overriding task.

My Training in Christian Formation

In 1983-4, I was admitted into the Institute of Christian Formation, a 12-month, intensive, daily retreat in everyday life based on the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius, the sixteenth-century founder of the Society of Jesus.

This 365-day retreat was facilitated by highly trained and long-experienced spiritual guides on staff at St. Benedict’s Roman Catholic Monastery and Education Center in Winnipeg, Canada.

Acceptance into the Institute was by interview.

Aspiring candidates like myself had to commit to a minimum of one hour each day (a maximum of three hours) spent in silence in the presence of the Lord every day for 365 days.

Each hour included about 20 minutes of prayer of the heart and the rest in preparation using scriptural meditation. 

I chose to commit to the maximum of 3 hours of prayer each day for the period of 12 months.

You might well be surprised that I opted for the maximum, especially in view of the fact that I was a wife who had an extremely busy professional husband and a mother who had 2 active young daughters!

Nevertheless, this heavy commitment was a very easy choice for me.

It certainly was not due to any special ‘holiness’ on my part.

You see, in the 4 months before, thanks to my new, highly-gifted spiritual guide, I had discovered the way of a simple way of prayer that does not use words and that deliberately lets go of thoughts and feelings —the way of praying from and with your heart alone. 

It’s critically important to understand what your human heart actually is in the Lord’s eyes. 

As a direct result, in the 4 months prior to this retreat, I had met the Lord directly —and repeatedly.

Once you meet the Lord in this way, you never want to look back.

You only want more.

You see, this way of praying had demonstrated to me, once and for all, that I, a humble human woman, could without question get to know the Lord in the same real way that I knew my spouse and children and confidante.

I could know the 3 Persons of the Trinity in the same way the first disciples had known Jesus —in fact, even better, since the disciples had been in close association with Him for just 3 years, while I had the rest of my lifetime!

So …to be with the Lord without using any words for 3 one-hour sessions, for 365 days, was a no-brainer for me.

I grabbed the opportunity!

And, over a period of about 15 months, this is exactly what happened.

First, I got very close to Jesus.

Then Jesus took me to His Father.

Then both took me to the Holy Spirit, Jesus’ representative here on earth.

I found each Person of the Trinity to be utterly attractive, beautiful, gentle, utterly loving, reliable, patient, loyal, 24/7 available.

They captivated me.

I used scripture as my preparation for silent prayer  (for about 20 - 30 minutes, in the beautiful way to which my guide had introduced me in the 4 months prior), followed by about 20 minutes of silent prayer of the heart. 

This was how each one of my one-hour prayer periods was broken down.

Also mandatory for entrance into the Institute was a commitment to one hour of spiritual guidance each week for 52 consecutive weeks.

Also mandatory were monthly group meetings with the other Institute participants, each meeting led by our 2 special guides.

A Bit About My 2 Spiritual Retreat Guides

 

There was no doubt that our two guides were well educated academically and theologically.

But, more important, they had allowed God Himself to educate and shape their souls and spirits and lives over their many long years on the spiritual journey.

As a result, they had amassed —both individually and collectively —a wealth of wisdom, a wealth of love and peace and joy, as well as a long, personal experience of God’s sometimes inexplicable ways with us complex human beings!

They were carriers of Jesus who radiated His life and spirit!

Our group was small, made up of only 4 participants and 2 guides.

This meant that the transformation of the 4 participants could take place at a much deeper level, and quite a bit sooner, than would have been the case perhaps in a slightly larger group.

Praying from and with Your Human Heart

As I’ve already noted, it’s critically important to understand what your human heart actually is in the Lord’s eyes. 

But in order to place my prayer experience during these special 365 days in context for you, bear with me while I say just a bit more about this now.

Obviously, words and thoughts and feelings are necessary for, and are part and parcel of, other forms of prayer.

But when you want to experience God’s presence, love, and peace directly, any one of these 3 things can get in the way.

Feelings come from an active emotional centre.

Words and thoughts come from an active intellect.

Both are perfectly natural and human.

In fact, they are part and parcel of your and my God-created humanity.

But here’s the thing:

when you wish to open your whole self (i. e. what the Lord calls your heart) to God’s presence, an active emotional centre and an active, stimulated intellect can get between the essential ‘you’, the ‘you’ that is your heart,  the ‘you’ that matters most to God  —and God himself!

You and I know it’s very easy to speak many words to God.

But this is no guarantee that our hearts are in the same place as the words we speak!

You and I know this well from our ordinary human conversations. How often have you found yourself speaking ‘words’ to someone and yet, deep down, be preoccupied with something completely different!

It’s always our heart that the Lord is after (Matthew 15:8).

So …the Christian journey is about aligning our hearts to our words.

When praying with your heart, you align yourself to God himself.

You do this by learning to let go of words and thoughts and feelings! 

Learning How to Discern Good and Evil

  In a Direct, Experiential Way

Next, I also learned how to discern good and evil in a direct, experiential way.

To help me do this, my guide invited me to take as much time as I needed to look first at the ‘good’ (love) I had received in my life, and then at the good (love) I had passed on to others.

When my guide thought I was ready, she invited me to do the same with the evil (anti-love) I had received and the evil (anti-love) I had passed on to others.

When you do these two exercises consistently over a number of weeks, and at the very same time combine them with 3 hours spent each day in the Lord’s presence, love and rest —an amazing thing happens —which is that the Lord himself becomes your Teacher.

It was from Him that I learned, and to this day continue to learn, everything I know about good (love) and evil (anti-love).

This hands-on, deeply experiential and deeply personal introduction to the good (love) and evil (non-love) in my own life and in the lives of others (the Lord himself included) proved to be the key factor for me in the year’s intensive retreat.

God’s love and its opposite, evil, and the massive ramifications of both for human lives, were no longer just two important theological truths.

They became definitively imprinted on my being.

They became for me stark realities that have specific, powerful implications for all our lives. 

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Finally, the weekly spiritual guidance sessions with my skilled guide ensured that I received the necessary supervision and guidance in all these areas.

This allowed me to stay ‘on course’, to maintain a spiritual integrity and transparency, and to receive the support and care I needed for this journey.

In short, it enabled me to benefit to the fullest from this ongoing, daily, firsthand meeting with the Lord.

The Enneagram

A basic introduction to the Enneagram system/theory was also mandatory for all participants in the Institute.

The Enneagram theory is a 9-point system which helps people understand, and put to use, their unique giftedness.

At the same time, it’s an exceptional tool for helping Christian women avoid —and ultimately heal —the personal suffering that comes with a lack of awareness of their individual areas of weakness and limitation.

It empowers women to gradually grow into their most balanced, fruitful selves. 

It demonstrates each woman’s particular way to transformation and healing. 

The Shalem Institute for Spiritual Formation

At the age of 48, 12 years after completing the Institute retreat, I was successfully admitted into the distinguished Shalem Institute for Spiritual Formation in Bethesda, Maryland, USA for further training in spiritual guidance.

Due to a family crisis, however, I had to withdraw at the last minute.

My Work Record

For over a quarter of a century, I regularly accompanied and guided Christian women on their spiritual journeys.

These women were of different ages (none younger that 35 though), from a wide variety of Christian denominations (from Pentecostal to Roman Catholic!) and with a wide variety of life experiences.

This included presenting one-day retreats, monthly prayer and guidance sessions, and individual spiritual guidance sessions.

My Own Regular Spiritual Guidance

In addition to my training, I have myself, for 34 years, been receiving regular spiritual guidance from trained and long-experienced Christian guides, typically over the age of fifty, holy and humble men and women dedicated to the Lord and the spreading of His Good News.

Usually, each session has been once a month but sometimes weekly, depending on what might have been happening in my life.

All share a-hundred-percent commitment to helping others find and be found by God, so that they can in turn do the same for others.

This regular spiritual guidance helps keep me honest and transparent in my own relationship with God, both vital requirements for anyone who undertakes the spiritual guidance of others.

I also hold a B.A. Degree in English, History and Social Anthropology (1969, University of Durham, UK) and a Diploma in Early Childhood Education (1984, with Distinction) from the London Montessori Centre, UK.

Please note:

I am not trained in counseling.

Other Credentials

I am also the author of How I Learned to Let God Find Me in the Good Times and the Bad: A Spiritual Memoir, available at Amazon.com, Amazon.co.uk

and a contributing writer to My Creative Thoughts and How Big Can You Dream?

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